Missed Opportunities

by

We are hikers.
Unlike the scouts, we don’t want to expose ourselves to the stress of being ready at all times on our paths. Being prepared to take advantage of every opportunity is the best way to burnout and the opposite of a relaxing hike. If you miss one opportunity, another is bound to come along.

Wir sind Wanderer.
Keineswegs wollen wir uns wie die Pfadfinder dem Stress aussetzen, auf unseren Wegen allzeit bereit zu sein. Auf jede Gelegenheit vorbereitet zu sein um sie zu nutzen, ist der beste Weg zum Burnout und das Gegenteil zum erholsamen Wandern. Verpasst man eine Gelegenheit, kommt bestimmt eine andere.

But that’s just one way of thinking about missed opportunities. There’s often the other side, which is to be annoyed that you weren’t prepared to take the chance that came your way. That’s what happened to Hanne-Dina, who saw a smartly styled barman in the setting of a classic English pub and was too shy to ask him if she could take his picture. It was a missed opportunity that she was very annoyed about.

Aber das ist nur die eine Art, über verpasste Gelegenheiten nachzudenken. Es gibt häufig die andere Seite, nämlich sich darüber zu ärgern, dass man nicht bereit war, die Chance zu ergreifen, die sich einem bot. So erging es Hanne-Dina, die einen fesch gestylten Barkeeper in der Kulisse eines klassisch englischen Pubs sah und zu schüchtern war, ihn zu fragen, ob sie ihn fotografieren dürfe. Das war eine verpasste Gelegenheit, über die sie sich mächtig ärgerte.

A few days later, however, she had learnt something new. She boldly asked a walker with his Weimaraner if she could take a photo of his dog. The gentleman felt honoured and the dog posed without any shyness for a whole minute before he happily run off.
This was a unique opportunity for a photo that later won a prize in a competition.

Einige Tage später hatte sie jedoch dazugelernt. Sie fragte kühn einen Spaziergänger mit seinem Weimaraner, ob sie den Hund fotografieren dürfe. Der Herr fühlte sich geehrt, der Hund posierte ohne jede Scheu.
Das war eine einmalige Gelegenheit für ein Foto, das später bei einem Wettbewerb prämiert wurde.

And the moral of the story?
Seizing every opportunity is an unattainable ideal, which also means you run the risk of losing your direction. It’s the same in art as it is in life. If you’re so obsessed with seizing every opportunity, you don’t just have to imagine what will happen as a photographer. You have to anticipate the future. That’s the magic of life and photography.

Und die Moral von der Geschicht?
Alle Chancen zu nutzen, ist ein unerreichbares Ideal, mit dem man auch Gefahr läuft, seine Richtung zu verlieren. Das ist in der Kunst so wie im Leben. Ist man so besessen davon, jede Gelegenheit zu nutzen, muss man sich nicht nur als Fotograf vorstellen, was passieren wird. Man muss die Zukunft vorhersehen. Das ist die Magie des Lebens und der Fotografie.

Keep cool and notice chances
Bleibt entspannt und nehmt Chancen wahr

The Fab Four of Cley
🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

.

© text and illustrations, Hanne Siebers & Klausbernd Vollmar, Cley next the Sea 2024

127 thoughts

  4. That is one fine looking dog and an excellent photograph. We can’t beat ourselves up over missed opportunities, we just need to be open to new ones when we can. Sometimes the timing just isn’t right. Have a super weekend.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    • Dear Darlene

      we agree, “we can’t beat ourselves up over missed opportunities”. That blocks us noticing new chances.
      The dog looks dignified. Dina, as a dog person, had to photograph that Weimaraner.

      Thank you for your comment. Wishing you a relaxing weekend
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Hi David,

      we agree that life is short. Why bother about opportunities? There is more to life than catching up with opportunities.

      All the best
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Love the doggy pictures. It is so hard to ask a stranger for a photograph, but I find people who work behind counters nearly always oblige, I think they like to be noticed as a person rather than just a shop assistant/bartender.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    • Good evening, dear Fraggle,

      it our experience as well that people working behind counters want to be noticed and seen as individuals. Well, fortunately Dina felt much freer asking strangers after this episode.

      Thanks for commenting. Wishing you an easy weekend
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Like

  11. Dina, we love the doggy photos too.
    And even more, because we were there when it was taken on our busy coast path after Christmas. The dog was wearing a thick collar with a gps tracker and other stuff and was eager to get run along with all the holiday making dogs.
    History records some enormous missed opportunities. For example, a British government committee rejected Thomas Edison’s invention of the light bulb stating “… it is OK for our transatlantic friends … but unworthy of the attention of practical or scientific men.” 🤔
    Fairy dust and hugs,
    Siri 🧚🏻‍♀️😊 & Selma 🧚🏻‍♀️😊

    Liked by 8 people

    Reply

    • What a surprise that you two write a comment too.

      Well, I am not a dog person but I find that doggy picture okay. I am much more interested what it is about missed or used opportunities in our everyday life. This is interesting and these dog pictures are only an example for chances we meet everywhere and every time in our life. What a GREAT example of a missed opportunity with Edison’s light bulb. It’s strange, missed opportunities are more entertaining that then the one we used. Maybe that’s gloating or mischievousness, a joy that is produced by what happened other people what we have have experienced as well.

      With hugs & love
      Klausbernd 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  13. My dear friends, I love the look the dog gives us, what a beauty!
    Your relaxed and reflected view on life in general is a healthy approach. A recent research show that regretting missed opportunities or things we didn’t do is greater than the regrets for the mistakes we made. I think, we often feel regret when we find out the opportunity we chose not to follow would have turned out well. That goes for me. I have a regret, a missed opportunity I neglected too long. It’s personal, but I’m convinced I have deprived myself of much love and happiness because I favoured my studies many years ago. It bounces back on me reading your post so I can’t be totally wrong. Heyho, it’s foregone.
    I’m so happy I took your advice to buy Karl Over Knausgaard’s “Wolves of Eternity”. What a mind-blowing read it is!
    Kram
    Annalena x

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Dear Annalena,

      when we regret missed opportunities we quite often idealise the effect it would have had on our lives if we hadn’t missed them. Unfortunately, we idealise quite often what we don’t have – ‘the grass is always greener on the other side’. We react in this respect like masochists. What counts is if we are happy NOW. Forget about the past that can’t be changed anyway and the future is open to more than we imagine. If I reflect my life then quite some of the so called ‘missed opportunities’ weren’t opportunities at all. Of course, we are always confronted with opportunities but if they lead to something positive in our life we can only see (often much) later. I suppose, best is to decide and stay with decision without starting to doubt it. Whatever we decided is the right decision for us, we just have to try to make the best of it.

      We all have the tendency to make our life more complicated than it actually is. In our society we feel the pressure always to achieve meaning taking the best decisions. But as I said, the best decision is the one we have taken. I have to admit I am sure the best is (at least for me) to be relaxed and follow the old saying ‘don’t worry, be happy’.

      “The Wolves of Eternity” gets better as further you read.

      With hugs and lots of love from us all
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  14. Fab Four of Cley,
    You’ve given a wonderful lesson, along with a magnificent job of photography by Hanne! She may have missed the man at the pub, but I still remember the older gentleman who appeared to be out of a 19th Century seaman painting!! This portrait of a dog rightfully won a prize.
    Have a terrific weekend and stay well,
    GP

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Our dear friend GP

      thank you very much for liking our post.
      Now Dina has learned. She asked people without any hesitation if she may photograph them.

      With warm greetings from the cold sea
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Danke Uschi,

      da wird sich Dina über dein Lob freuen.

      Mit lieben Grüßen nach Frankfurt für dich und Herbert
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Like

  16. Hanne, I adore your animal portraits and this dog is no exception.
    As for missed opportunities, I say it with Frank Sinatra:
    Regrets, I’ve had a few
    But then again, too few to mention
    I did what I had to do …
    I hope you are all keeping well, have a wonderful weekend.
    Klem
    Per Magnus x

    Liked by 4 people

    Reply

    • Dear Per Magnus

      that’s the best attitude ‘I did what I had to do’. I feel like you.
      We are keeping well. We make it as cosy as possible when the cold northerly winds blow over sea. We cook together and Dina is very good mixing cocktails we enjoy in the evenings.
      Everything is fine and we hope the same at yours.

      KRAM
      🤗🤗🤗🤗
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  18. A wonderful reflection on the idea of risk. I agree wholeheartedly – not taking chances can lead to missed opportunities for personal growth and new experiences. It can result in feelings of regret and stagnation. Comfort zones, in the long run, at not comfortable. Yesterday, my sister, Sarah and I were discussing the ideas of “fate”, “destiny” and “kismet” so it was serendipitous that I should read your post today. Serendipity often presents itself unexpectedly, bringing forth new opportunities that may not have been foreseen.

    Dina – a beautiful portrait! Sending much love and many hugs to our dear friends, The Fab Four of Cley.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    • Good morning, dear Rebecca,

      isn’t it a sign of alienation that we want to take every opportunity for success, growth etc. That means, we define ourselves by our success rate. In our success orientated society it’s better to be relaxed and use the privilege to be able to stay in our comfort zone. Every glossy paper we have a look at wants to make us leave our comfort zone. But why? Isn’t it allowed to leave the meritocracy?

      We know that’s one site of the problem of dealing with opportunities. The other side is, we are all so vain that we want to stay attractive, even in old age. Not to miss opportunities helps to stay attractive.

      Well, opportunities and destiny. We suppose we are our destiny and fate. In former times it were the gods who were in charge of destiny, nowadays it’s us.
      Anyway, that is a big topic for another post.

      Thanks for inspiring us to go on thinking about our topic – like you often do. We like it!
      With lots of love from the sunny sea
      🤗🤗🤗🤗
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • I agree wholeheartedly, Klausbernd. We cannot be engaged and enamored by success as defined by society. Far better to be an outlier. Thank YOU for inspiring me!!! Much love and hugs to my dear, dear friends, The Fab Four of Cley!!

      Liked by 3 people

    • Dear Rebecca,

      I come from a kind of eccentric family. When I was child and even in my early teens I wanted to be normal. I was expected to be everything but not a mainstream achiever. I am – again or still – quite sceptical why I should achieve. There is this feeling that this destroys my freedom and a casual and cool lifestyle I like. I have reached an age I can just enjoy life beyond performing. I outsource performing and achieving 😉

      With lots of love ❤ ❤
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂  

      Liked by 2 people

  20. Absolutely exceptional pictures!!!

    Dieser Beitrag, Ihr Lieben, erinnert mich an das griechische Wort “Kairos” [= guenstiger Augenblick] und die Darstellung des Kairos mit kahlem Hinterkopf und die deutsche Redensart “etwas am Schopfe packen”.

    Liebe Gruesse,

    Pit

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Habe ganz herzlichen Dank, lieber Pit. Ich habe den guten alten Kairos völlig vergessen. Naja, ich war auch keine Leuchte in Altphilologie. Und Dank für die Erklärung der deutschen Redensart. Das haben wir nicht gewusst.

      So greifen wir die Gelegenheit am Schopfe und senden ganz liebe Grüße vom sonnigen Meer nach Texas
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Like

    • Urspruenglich hatte ich geglaubt, lieber Klausbernd, es sei Fortuna, die mit Haaren vorn auf dem Kopf und Glatze hinten dargestellt wurde, aber beim Googeln fand ich dann heraus, dass es Kairos war.

      Liebe Gruesse,

      Pit

      Liked by 1 person

    • Ja toll, lieber Pit.
      Auch ich dachte, für den rechten Augenblick sei Fortuna zuständig. Naja, wenn’s ein glücklicher Augenblick war, ist es wohl auch ihr zuzuschreiben.
      Hab’s fein und nochmals vielen Dank
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Fortuna wird, so habe ich gelesen, lieber Klausbernd, oft mit verbundenen Augen dargestellt, weil sie – angeblich – ihr Glueck ohne Ansehen der Person verteilt. Aber wie passt das mit “Den Tuechtigen winkt das Glueck” [Fortes Fortuna adiuvat”] zusammen?

      Und passen die verbundenen Augen nicht wirklich besser zu Iustitia?

      Liebe Gruesse,

      Pit

      Liked by 1 person

    • Lieber Pit,

      darüber musste ich erst einmal nachdenken. Kann es sein, dass Fortuna mit verbundenen Augen eher die ältere Vorstellung ist, wo man das Glück wie bei Homer als abhängig von der Lust und Laune der Götter ansah. ‘Fortes Fortuna adiuvat’ ist wohl moderner, klingt wie ein Leitspruch unserer modernen Gesellschaften.
      Die verbundenen Augen kenne ich von Iustitia, wo sie, zumindest für mich, mehr Sinn machen.

      Hier ist heute graues, irkeliges Wetter. Da liebe ich es, gemütlich drinnen zu sitzen und etwas zu bloggen.

      Mit ganz lieben Grüßen von uns hier im kleinen Dorf am großen Meer
      Klausbernd 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  21. The moment I saw the header photo I felt warm and fuzzy. Over Christmas we were asked to house and dog sit. I am very much a dog person but have been petless all throughout my (38yr) marriage (sigh). So I was delighted to spend time with Murphy, a Visla – who is a close relative to the Weimaraner. Murphy is so well trained, that when I took a farewell photo all I had to do was tell her to “Sit! Look at me!” and I got the most perfect memento.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Dear Gwendoline

      thank you very much for your comment. Hanne-Dina is a dog person as well. She grew up with dogs as her father was a breeder.

      Wishing you a wonderful weekend
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Through family history research I have found a great-grandfather who was a pioneer in Victoria – then a colony of Great Britain – in dog breeding and establishing Kennel Societies. In the early 1900s his daughter won a first with her rough-coated collie when she was only eight years old. So I guess that is “DNA” 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • Good morning, dear Derrick,

      yes, now we see this as well. A lot of people like to be asked to be photographed. Hanne-Dina likes photographing portraits of people and animals.

      Keep well and happy
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you very much, dear Pete 🙏 🙏

      Wishing you a happy weekend. Here at the sea it’s beautiful, sunny and warm. Spring has sprang with daffs everywhere and trees in full blossom.

      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  25. When it comes to noticing opportunities, one thing I’ve observed many times over the years is that if I go out walking in nature to take photographs and return along the same path, it’s common for me to notice on my way back something conspicuous that I’d walked right past on my way out and hadn’t seen at all.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Thanks, dear Steve, to tell us about your experiences. We know that as well. We walk a path many times but we oversee chances to take special pictures and all by the sudden we are aware of it. We don’t mind that we didn’t see this before.

      We noticed that most photographers notice the same opportunities for taking a picture. It’s a kind of convention what you see as a chance. Therefore we see the net full of similar pictures. We suppose, it has to do with conventions what we see as a opportunity or chance.

      Keep well
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Like

    • Dear Brad
      Hanne-Dina is a dog-whisperer, she is kind of speaking doggish. That helps to photograph dogs.
      Thanks and cheers
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂     

      Liked by 1 person

    • Guten Morgen, liebe Karin.

      Habe herzlichen Dank für deinen Kommentar. Solche Bilder sind natürlich mit Photoshop und KI bearbeitet. Da liegt die Fähigkeit der Fotografin, wie sie mit diesen Hilfsmitteln umzugehen versteht.

      Mit lieben Grüßen vom Meer in den Elsass
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  32. Dear Klausbernd and Team, many thanks for your life lesson and the great pictures, which will help me to think more intensively

    about whether an opportunity is worthwhile taking or not! Many thanks and enjoy this Sunday:)

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Dear Martina,

      thank you very much for your kind comment.
      That’s the basic question ‘Is it worthwhile taking an opportunity or let it go?’ In ancient times the Greeks personified the right moment to react, it was καιρός (Kairos).

      Keep healthy and happy.
      With love from the sea
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  34. Advancing years makes one appreciate more that the opportunities are to be taken when presented and fear of embarrassment is a foolish thought to carry around with one. We are human and mistakes and silliness are part of our make-up. Great shots of the dog and we can only picture in our imagination what that barman looked like! A pity!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Dear Paddy,

      well, we always need mysteries and so the barman will stay a mystery for our readers forever.
      Taking all the opportunities we are offered we are ending upn like ‘Hans in Luck’ (Hans im Glück) with nothing. I just read the novel “The Romantic” by William Boyd in which the protagonist takes one opportunity after the other which doesn’t make him happy. But I haven’t finished it yet, maybe on the last 50 pages he will find his happiness.

      Thanks and all the best
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  35. Wow! These are superb photos and there is such a soul behind the eye’s of the dog. Congratulations to Hanne for winning a prize for the photo and this is highly deserved. Thank you also for sharing the valuable lesson – one needs reminding! Annika

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Thanks a lot, dear Annika 🙏 🙏

      Sorry that we didn’t answer earlier but your comment ended up in spam for unknown reasons where we found it today.
      Hanne-Dina was quite happy for getting this prize. She loves dogs as well as her photography 😉

      Wishing you a wonderful week to come
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • A lot of my comments seem to be heading to spam these days! 😔 Those WP gremlins at play! Glad you found it!

      The sun out here and so cheering to feel Spring on the way! Wishing you all a great week too! 😀

      Liked by 2 people

    • By the way here another recommendation, dear Annika:
      Karl Ove Knausgård ‘The Wolves of Eternity’
      As farther you read in this book as better it gets.

      The weather is that beautiful that I will mow our lawn now.
      All the best
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Lisa,

      we are very happy that our text helped you. Not to worry about missed opportunities makes life much easier.

      Good luck and all the best
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  40. The trouble with missed opportunities is that you also don’t know if you missed an opportunity or not. Some opportunities might be a waste of time. Others bring you on a different path. But you might also take a different path if you don’t seize an opportunity.

    As you say, we cannot predict the future.

    So I guess it is best to decide in the spur of the moment and see what happens…

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • We agree. You are absolutely right.
      To speak of missed opportunities is a sign of pessimism.
      All the best and thanks for commenting
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Like

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  47. I love this ~ in addition to the striking photos of the Weimaraner. While I am a true believer in the thought “if you miss one opportunity, another is bound to come along.” Like Dina, I can be bummed about a missed photo because I didn’t want to ‘disturb’ the scene I admired, much like she did at the pub… but I guess it could have been this missed opportunity that triggered Dina into requesting a photo-shoot of this regal Weimaraner.

    The moral you have with this post is something to always keep in mind, and something important for me, as I try to capture all opportunities (photographs especially for me), that by trying to seize it all, I often end up with nothing – lost in the thought of what could have been :-). “Keep cool and notice chances…” this is a good motto for me this spring! Thank you, Fab Four 👱🏻‍♂️👱🏻‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚

    Liked by 4 people

    Reply

    • Good morning, dear Randall,

      and what a beautiful morning, sunshine and warm.

      Thanks for your comment. Actually, we suppose the idea of missed opportunities has a touch of masochism. It’s the product of our meritocracy and basically it has to do with alienation. We define ourselves in terms of success. Erich Fromm wrote the book “To have or to be” about it (about 50 years ago). Anyway, we spoil our happiness thinking in the concept of missed opportunities.

      Now I take the opportunity to mow our lawn because I don’t want to miss the opportunity of the dry weather 😉

      Wishing you a wonderful week. Warm greetings from the cold sea from us all
      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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  53. Ich vertraue darauf, dass man die Chancen, die wichtig/gemeint sind, auch ergreift, auch wenn ich mich natürlich auch manchmal ärgere über eine vermeintlich verpasste, unwiederbringliche Chance.

    Viele Grüße

    Belana Hermine

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  54. Deswegen “vermeintlich” – ich denke nicht, dass es unwiederbringliche Chancen gibt. Vielleicht kommt eine konkrete Chance nicht noch einmal. Das heißt aber nicht, dass das Resultat, das sich aus dem Wahrnehmen dieser Chance ergeben hätte, nicht auf andere Weise einstellt.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    • Das Konzept der unwiederbringlichen Chancen scheint mir ein Konstrukt der Leistungsgesellschaft zu sein.
      Dann hoffen wir mal, auf viele Chancen für uns

      The Fab Four of Cley
      🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  56. Good on Dina for asking – and the results are beautiful. Shining dog portraits! That breed is very dignified, and Hanne, Dina shows him/her from the best side. I am not good at asking…too shy. But the few times I feel comfortable with it, the feeling is usually pleasing – to my shy self that I dared asking.

    Best wishes,

    Ann-Christine

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

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